Me (shuffilling through my bag to find my keys): That's not a spider, sweetie, its a piece of string, just pick it up and throw it in the trash.
Chloe: No it's not, it's a yucky spider.
Me: Okay, just don't touch it.
Payton: Chloe, its just a string. See?
(Payton picks up the string and dangles it in Chloes face)
Chloe (shreiking): Ahh! Payton get that out of my face. Mommy Payton put the spider in my face.
Payton: It's not a spider!
Me: You two wait outside while I find my keys.
(I turn over the couch cushions while Payton and Chloe walk to the door)
Chloe: Mommy there is a kitty.
Payton: She looks hungry.
Chloe: Mommy the kitty wants to come inside.
Me: Don't let that cat inside!
Chloe: But she is huuuungry!
Me: Don't let that cat inside!
Chloe: The kitty likes me. Mommy I want to sit on the porch.
Payton: You don't want to sit on the porch, you just want to play with that cat.
Me (searching my coat pockets for my keys): Go on outside. I'll be there in a minute.
Payton: I'm going outside too.
Me: Okay don't let that cat inside.
Payton: Okay....oops Mommy! The cat got inside.
Me (frantic): Get him out, shoo shoo.
Payton: Look Mommy I found your keys in the door.
(5 minutes later dropping the kids off at daycare)
Chloe to daycare provider: Ms. Sheila, we got a new kitty.
Ms. Sheila: You did? What did you name it?
Chloe: Brewster
Payton: We didn't get a cat.
Chloe: Uh-huh, we did so.
Me: Chloe we found the cat on our porch, it isn't our cat. I have to go now, eat all your lunch today.
Chloe: I'm saving the peas for Brewster.
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