My weapon of torture = chore list.
That's right, every Saturday morning I pull down the Chore Board and review all the incomplete chores of the week.
Funny enough, every week the children are able to complete the same number of chores before Saturday. Zero. So Saturday mornings have become a bonanza-fest of choredom. Today I took 2 colored index cards, wrote Payton and Chloes name on the top of their index cards, and told them each chore would earn them one smiley face sticker. If they earned 20 stickers we would buy them the plastic fish pool on sale at K-Mart. Ready, Set, Go. And Payton ran off to clean her room (which was worth 2 stickers since it was pretty messy).
Chloe on the other hand, could not be convinced away from pulling the paint off the walls. "Come on Chloe, you can earn smiley face stickers for your card!" I tried to encourage her. "Stickers! They are glittery! And if you earn enough we'll get you a baby pool to play in!"
Six threats and 2 timeouts later her room was clean enough, which is to say my encouragement was in the grey level where anything goes. For goodness sakes, she is only four! ( I use this line when my patience has run out)
Chloe's chore list became sparse. While Payton was dusting the furniture and watering the garden for 1 sticker, Chloe was putting one piece of clothing in her dirty clothes. Good job! Here is a sticker. Now put your shoes on and that's worth 2 stickers!
I even gave the lazy bones husband 3 stars for pulling himself away from WoW long enough to vacuum the floor.
After 3 hours of cleaning, encouraging and bargaining with the children to pitch in, I left the house for a break to clean my car, wash, vacuum, amoral, even new coconut air freshner!
When I got home they were all huddled up around the TV watching Drake and Josh. "Seriously?" I said, "Did you finish your chores?" I was not happy. How did I get blessed into this task master role??
At the end of another hour, the girls racked up enough stickers to buy the pool. I gave myself 15 stickers for cleaning the mildew out of the shower because that was wretched. My reward was lunch at Chili's.
Chili's....I ask the waitress, do you have any vegetarian dishes? "Vegatarians dont eat at Chili's" she said. "Well I'm here, and I was planning to eat!" I said. "You could get the nachos," she suggested. "They don't have meat?" I asked. "No, they don't." "Okay, I'll take them," I said.
30 minutes later I bite into a cheesy jalapeno ladened nacho chip. What is that chewiness? None other than hamburger meat. Ick. "Excuse me this has meat." "Oh I told them no meat, I'll get new ones." Hmmm, turns out the meat is in the cheese. So I ordered veggie fajitas and took them to go. I was totally traumatized by my meat encounter. What was worse, the waitress didn't comp the meal. Did you hear about that guy in India who sued Taco Bell for giving him a beef burrito instead of a bean one?
Then we drive to K-Mart to get the baby pool for the kids. Chris takes one look at the pool which is sitting outside of K-Mart's entrance. "That isn't going to fit in the car." "I'll carry it home," I said because I told the kids they could have this pool and I was determined to keep my word. Chris drives off with Chloe, and Payton and I carry the pool inside to the register.
"How much was this pool?" the cashier asks.
"Um, it said $15.99."
"$16 is too much to pay for this. Good news, its on sale for $11," she says.
"Cool!"
Then Payton and I start the mile hike home, holding a gigantic plastic pool over our heads. We must have looked super redneck carrying that thing down the streets. Children pointed, old people on their porch shook their heads. A couple of times the wind caught the pool and sent it flying into neighbor's yard. But overall the walk was fun, despite the 100 degree heat, we were in good spirits when we got home.
The kids played in the pool for an hour, then went with Chris to Brewsters, where he brought me back a much craved mint chocolate chip ice cream with peanut butter cups, whipped cream and cherries. I ate 3 bites and was done. Though it was right delicious, I am curbing the calories and the eating out.
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment